Monday, September 17, 2007

Outside influences in our Home

This past weekend we had family over and it probably was one of the hardest weekends I have had in a long time. Sometimes we do not think about the people we allow in our homes wether they are family or not. This person whom I care for and love deeply has a tendency of needing way too much attention than I am able to give.
Mother's I beg please be careful on who and whom you allow into your home.
Do not get me wrong I am all into having guests and families in my home over for dinner and etc...
But when that person seems to be coming in and invading precious time that should be devoted to our family is when we need to take a step back and really evaluate why we are allowing this person to do this.
I have spent many years of my life helping other people to the point that I did not have anything left for my own family. It took me a long time to realize but family MUST come first.
My weekend consisted of entertaining and talking meanwhile my children sat next to me waiting patiently just to give me a hug and a kiss. Or maybe just wanted to tell me something that really had no reason behind it. But because I was too busy entertaining I could not comply.
We need to make sure that when we have guests that they see a parent who is willing to tear themselves from their entertainment and give their complete attention to their families.
I was dissapointed in the fact that I allowed them to take that time away from children.
Our children need us...Let me say say this again OUR CHILDREN NEED US.
When we entertain we put that guest as our focus and then irritation begins. Because we are trying so hard to please them that we make opur own families unhappy. This is NOT SHALOM BAYIT!!
So what did I do. I made a point to stop my entertaining and focus on my family and set the example for them to realize that nothing to me is more important (outside of Hashem) than stopping and looking at my children and devoting that time. These people are not more important than my family. And Although it is nice to ahve company but it is not nice to exclude our children because we think they needs us more at that time.
G-d forbid that anyone would come over my children or husband. They need me. I can be a friend but I cannot allow anyone to invade my Shalom Bayit.
I need to show these people that there is Shalom Bayit and that my house will run they way it would normally run whether they are there or not.
it was hard but I was determined. There is plenty of time after the children have gone to bed to entertain.
Can I tell you my weekend didnt end so bad. This person complimented me on my children and my manner with them. That was the little bit of light at the end of the tunnel.

No comments:

One's belief in God must come through faith and not because of miracles. "Rebbe Nachman of Breslov"